May the Force be With You!

In preparing for my opening day speech for my staff each year, I always look for a theme that can help support our school culture and give us a continual message that carries through the year. Throughout the summer, I struggled to find a theme that would work for the upcoming school year until attending a conference in August. The conference focused on student mental health in schools. During one of the keynotes, Charles Appelstein was discussing the importance of building relationships with students and he reenacted a famous battle scene from Star Wars as part of his speech... at that point I had my theme.

In preparing for the speech I did a little homework on the Star Wars franchise to see if I could figure out its overall value, figuring it had to be high for Disney to pay over $9 billion in 2012 just for the rights to the franchise. In reading, I have learned that the franchise has stacked tens of billions of dollars on top of each other through movie ticket sales, games, toys, TV series, rentals and clothing since the first movie came out in 1977. It has been an international phenomenon for multiple generations and has captured a whole new audience with the release of the 7th movie in the series this past year.

Given that understanding, sometimes I forget that there are people that have never seen the movies and therefore the reference to “May the Force be with You” may be lost on some. Therefore I thought I would highlight some of the main points/themes in the movies to help the larger point of this post and my speech make sense.  

So, the first thing is that Star Wars is science fiction and takes place “a long time ago, in galaxy far, far away.”  The Star Wars franchise is also constructed on a classic good vs. evil story line and this mystical thing called “The Force.” The Force is best described by a main character in Star Wars, Obi-Wan Kenobi, “Well, the Force is what gives a Jedi his power. It's an energy field created by all living things. It surrounds us and penetrates us; it binds the galaxy together.” Now there is a light side to the force and the dark side to the force. The light side is the side that Jedi’s use. They are a best described as monk-like knights. They are the good guys. The bad guys are the Sith and they use the dark side of the force. This dichotomy creates a classic good vs. evil story line. 

Good vs.

Evil

So now that you have at least a rudimentary understanding of the a main theme and element in the Star Wars saga, let us return to the statement “May the Force be with You.” This phrase is used by the Jedi to wish each other luck and positive outcomes in the face of an impending challenge. It was a call to the light side of the force and the victory of good over evil, to resist the temptations of the Dark Side and to remain positive in the face of evil. 

As we start a new school year, I wanted to remind the staff to continue the great work that we did last year to create a school that is warm and welcoming to students. We discussed our need to keep a strong focus on the power of building relationships with students and the impact that it can have on their learning. I told them, "There will be many times throughout the year when the pressures of our life and our job will mount and become heavy upon us; times when these stresses will pressure us to react to students behaviors with punitive actions. It is in these times, when we are at our worst that we have to choose to respond to the child’s behaviors instead of react to them." 

Responding instead of reacting means that as a child raises his/her voice, we lower ours instead. It means naming the child’s behavior or choice as the thing that we are disappointed in or upset by, rather than the child him or herself. It means monitoring our own body language and body position.  For example, when a child is becoming out of control,being sure to approach him or her slowly, in a calm manner, with a relaxed posture.

I said to the staff, "We can not allow ourselves to be seduced by the Dark Side. The Dark Side is the place where we yell at kids, where we use cutting sarcasm, where we set limits on kids based upon our hang ups, beliefs and opinions. The Dark Side is where we only make some of our students believe that we really care about them… the “good” ones. The Dark Side is the place where we don’t make our students feel like we have the greatest job in the world and the distinct privilege of educating them."

So what do we do when we feel the lure of the Dark Side? What do we do when a child says something to us or does something to us that feels disrespectful or hurtful? What do we do when we are up to our eyeballs in paperwork and assessments? What do we do when we don’t feel supported in our work? What do we do when our personal life has turmoil and is putting pressure on us? 

I went to a presentation this summer by Charles Appelstein, a renowned clinical social worker who authored the book No Such Thing as a Bad Kid. He talked about the importance of developing a strong Observing Ego (an ability to look at situations without putting ourselves in the situation) and provided practical strategies to use; one of which inspired this speech. He offers these five strategies to keep our cool under pressure in the face of the Dark Side:

1. Think of the struggle in terms of time limits. Like if a child has been pushing your buttons all day take a look at the clock and see how much time until the end of the day or until your next break from that child and tell yourself, “I can do anything for 90 minutes.” 
2. Visualize the end of the day and driving home. Think about driving home with a big smile on your face proud of the way you chose to respond to the students instead of react. 
3. Think about the future. Think about how your decision to respond now will build deeper relationships with your students going forward and make your life easier in the long run. 
4. Think about at M.A.S.H unit: When I am at my worst, I need to give my best.  Here he references the television show where even when the doctors were dead tired and wrung out, that when the helicopters arrived with new wounded soldiers they had to be at their best to try and save lives.  
5. And my favorite, Use the Force! – Draw from the positive energy of friends, colleagues, memories, family, etc....  whatever it takes to resist the Dark Side. 

The harsh truth is that only we can control our own behaviors. We won't because someone tells us too.  It is not because everything in our lives are going to work out perfectly so that we have nothing to worry about. It is not because we are only going to be sent perfect students that really don’t need to learn anything from us and never need reminders, encouragement, support or stability. It will only happen when each of us chooses to make building positive relationships with the students of our school a priority. When we take the time to consider how our behaviors may affect the students we connect with each day.

This video was shared with me by a kindergarten teacher and encapsulates the effect our interactions have on our students from the point of view of the student.

I closed by saying the following to my staff, "So as we go into this school year, let us be Jedi Knights in the way we interact with kids.  Set ambitious goals for your students and support them in getting there, get to know your students, their lives, their interests and their motivations, build positive energy in your learning environment, talk with your students. Disney world advertises itself as the “Happiest Place on Earth.” Let’s take that crown from them and make Forestdale (our school) the Happiest place on Earth. And as you move forward this year and face the challenges that will surely come “May the Force be With You!”